Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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