we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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