butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
love makes seman taste better
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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