WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
We were destined to go to rehab together
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
