The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
i need some magic done to my vagina
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Randomize
