I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
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