Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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