my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Boobs are out for the taking
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
