please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I fill condoms, not promises.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
its liver damage thursday
Randomize