i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
