i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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