Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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