i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
