I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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