I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Randomize
