I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
