I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
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