RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
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