Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
