am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
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