Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
When are your genitals available?
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
