Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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