have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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