My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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