what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Randomize
