we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Randomize
