: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
