hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
