Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Randomize
