You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
