i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Randomize
