The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Randomize