you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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