you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
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