Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
