Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Randomize
