If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
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