i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Randomize
