Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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