oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
