BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
