Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize