Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
It's shark week go big or go home
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
