they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize