we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Randomize
