I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
My life is pants optional.
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