idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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