Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize