The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Less talking, more tequila
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
