So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
