So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Randomize
